I spent a few years working at a law firm, and am currently working as a proposal writer. So a big focus in my line of work has been in appropriately defining terms. But adversity is one of those heavy words that can mean so many things, it seems almost too big to define. But I’ll still try.
2 Nephi 2:11 says:
11 For it must needs be, that there is an opposition in all things. If not so, my firstborn in the wilderness, righteousness could not be brought to pass, neither wickedness, neither holiness nor misery, neither good nor bad
And it continues:
14 ...for there is a God, and he hath created all things, both the heavens and the earth, and all things that in them are, both things to act and things to be acted upon.
Separation and defining opposition were the first elements of the creation:
1 In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth.
He divided the light from the darkeness
And he lifted the firmament from the waters.
And only after all those divisions were made, could life begin to be. Only then could the herb yield seed and the tree yield fruit.
Mankinds first lessons in Eden were in discerning adversity and becoming acquainted with pain. And we are part of that inheritance.
So many examples of adversity that I have seen in others lives seem too overwhelming to be fair. Francine R Bennion covered some of this topic in a talk she gave at a BYU Women’s conference. In describing suffering, she said:
Theology does not prevent all hurt and anguish. No knowledge of theology can remove all pain, weakness, or nausea from all terminal cancer. Nor can it fill an empty stomach. What sound theology can do is to help those who believe it to make some sense of the suffering, of themselves, and of God, such sense that they can proceed with a measure of hope, courage, compassion, and understanding of themselves even in anguish.
I hope that some of what I share today can contribute to that measure of hope. I am fortunate enough that I can fill my life with some healthy, easy adversity. When I wake up early enough, I go on a run before work. I am not fast, by any means, but I love pushing my body and stretching my muscles. We are so lucky to live next to a beautiful canyon and have hills that test our strength and speed. I’ve been timing my runs, and have an app on my phone that tells me how far I’ve gone, and what my pace is. And I feel a little happy burst if I find I’ve gotten even the slightest bit faster. After months, or sometimes even weeks of training, I find myself fitter, calmer, and healthier. The benefits come quickly, and it is easy to see that giving up sleep for momentary discomfort is worth it. This is what I think of as a daily, happy adversity. It is ultimately small, and easy to overcome because I can see the big picture, and feel the results of my labor fairly quickly. It’s tempting to compare our trails in life to something like this. A race with peaks and valleys that we will ultimately overcome, and be the better for. The only reason it is worth it is because I get to experience a beginning, middle, and end all in one morning. But in reality, our life is the smallest section or the race. And there is no beginning, and there is no end. And for many of us, we may not ever get to feel the vindication of training that has paid off.
The truth is, so much of pain is purposeless. It is not always enobling or purifying and it is far from God’s will. There is no beauty in children being killed in a mass shooting. Nothing divine in the millions who are affected by drought, famine, and disease. The Lord told Joseph Smith in D&C 122 that.
And if thou shouldst be cast into the pit, ...if thou be cast into the deep; if the billowing surge conspire against thee; if fierce winds become thine enemy; ...if the very jaws of hell shall gape open the mouth wide after thee, know thou, my son, that all these things shall give thee experience, and shall be for thy good.
This does not mean that adversity in and of itself is good, but that through Christ, it can be made good for us. In 2 Nephi, chapter 2, Lehi discussed this with Jacob, saying:
Thou art my firstborn in the days of my tribulation in the wilderness. And behold, in thy childhood thou hast suffered afflictions and much sorrow, because of the rudeness of thy brethren.
2 Nevertheless, Jacob,...thou knowest the greatness of God; and he shall consecrate thine afflictions for thy gain.
Even when it seems that affliction is for naught, when a body succumbs to cancer, or a mind is lost to alzheimers, or depression or anxiety makes daily life a trial. These things do not define the ultimate worth of our lives. Thy do not diminish our value to the Lord or the love he has for us. He can turn every bitter sweet. And undo every injustice.
One of my favorite passages of scripture is found in Joel 2. In it, there is a bleak description of events before the second coming. It describes thick darkness and gloom and destruction. Despite all the hardships the Lord’s people will face, He promises them a future abundance. He says
24 ...the floors shall be full of wheat, and the fats shall overflow with wine and oil.
25 And I will restore to you the years that the locust hath eaten, the cankerworm, and the caterpiller, and the palmerworm, my great army which I sent among you.
26 And ye shall eat in plenty, and be satisfied, and praise the name of the Lord your God, that hath dealt wondrously with you: and my people shall never be ashamed.
I first read this scripture the year my dad passed away unexpectedly after a car accident, and I had spent the next year, more or less, in a daze. I went to work, came home. And every day followed more or less the same in a blur of weeks. Looking back on that period felt like a season of lost time. A year that the locusts had eaten. But God’s promise is that all that is lost will be restored, and that we shall have plenty. I have felt some of the bounties of that harvest in several of the years since, and I am grateful to not have to wait to long to have seen the Lords’ hand at various points throughout my life.
This scripture will always feel bittersweet to me. The friend who shared it with me has since resigned her membership from the church. Many people I love have chosen to resign their membership. They are people who’s testomonies helped me grow, who were were patient with their own doubts, and compassionate to others. Unbeknownst to them, they had been reassuring me through their examples that if they could stay active in the church, so could I. It very, very lonely to have so many of them gone. And I am so sad, that for many of them the church had become such a place of pain for them instead of a place of solace.
A few years ago, I felt like there wasn’t a place for me here either. Why should I continue to even show up when people I cared about were treated cruelly. If my convictions were so at odds with what I was supposed to believe, why should I keep trying to push through such an obvious cognitive dissonance? I had contacted one of those friends to hear about his experience. He talked about feeling torn apart as he and his wife taught church history and ultimately choosing with his wife to leave. After, they felt like outsiders in their own families. He described how (and I wrote is down so I wouldn’t forget) he said. I want the inside circle and the outside circle to disappear. He wanted us all to become one.
It reminds me of the scriptures in 1st Corinthians 12 ;
13 For by one Spirit are we all baptized into one body, whether we be Jews or Gentiles, whether we be bond or free; and have been all made to drink into one Spirit.
14 For the body is not one member, but many…
21 And the eye cannot say unto the hand, I have no need of thee: nor again the head to the feet, I have no need of you...
25 That there should be no schism in the body; but that the members should have the same care one for another.
And I think that herein lies the key to truly overcoming adversity. We were not sent here on this earth alone, but to truly help each other reach eternal life. This is outlined in Mosiah 18: 8-9 When Alma invites all to baptism. He says:
8 ...Behold, here are the waters of Mormon (for thus were they called) and now, as ye are desirous to come into the fold of God, and to be called his people, and are willing to bear one another’s burdens, that they may be light;
9 Yea, and are willing to mourn with those that mourn; yea, and comfort those that stand in need of comfort, and to stand as witnesses of God at all times and in all things, and in all places that ye may be in, even until death, that ye may be redeemed of God, and be numbered with those of the first resurrection, that ye may have eternal life.
It is a requirement, that If we are to overcome adversity, we must have empathy. No man can enter the kingdom of heaven alone. This is one of the greatest gifts that God has given us to return to him, each other.
In Sharon Eubank’s talk last conference, explained how Christ Sees and love us. She said
“Christ tenderly told the Nephites, “I have commanded that none of you should go away.”7 It is an unwavering requirement of Christian disciples and Latter-day Saints to show true love to one another.9… she goes on to say “The Lord knows how hard you are trying. You are making progress. Keep going. He sees all your hidden sacrifices and counts them to your good and the good of those you love. Your work is not in vain. You are not alone. His very name, Emmanuel, means “God with us.” He is surely with you.”
In an article from BYU Humanities magazine, Thomas Griffith describes the atonement as reconciliation, becoming of one mind. He teaches, “The impulse of the disciple is not division, but at-one-ment. The impulse of the disciple is to reach out to the stranger.”
I believe that as long as we remember that God is with us, all of us, we will have all that is required to let adversity refine us.