Music for your Midweek: Stromae - quand c'est?

New new video from Stromae released this week. It's a beauty. Wish I could post it without the distracting subtitles, but c'est le vie. 

Also, can someone please buy me all these clothes. 

I'm claiming them as my new uniform.

Something for Sunday: Getting past being "past feeling"

I often find myself in these slumps where I feel nothing, see nothing, or hear nothing encouraging. I've fallen into a state of being "past feeling" too many times, and decided to make it a study topic a month or so ago. I finally revisited it, and found some helpful counsel. This clip of Elder Faust helped me put things in perspective:

Oftentimes, being "past feeling" is a sign of selfishness. One of my biggest vices. I used to only think of selfishness as it related to covetousness and jealousy. It was in wanting everything for yourself and for your benefit. But selfishness is also manifest in how our minds are occupied. I focus my thoughts on myself and my own happiness. Even praying or reading my scriptures becomes a selfish act as I focus on my needs and how it makes me feel vs. a form of worship. My mind is occupied so much with my own thoughts and concerns, it leaves little space for much else. In studying this topic, I was led to some helpful quotes that I think we can all benefit from:

“Our capacity to feel controls our behavior in many ways, and by inaction when our feelings prompt us to do good, we deaden that capacity to feel. It was Jesus’ striking sensitivity to the needs of those about him that made it possible for him to respond in action... When we become too encrusted with error, our spiritual antennae wilt and we slip beyond mortal reach. This can happen to entire civilizations... Imperviousness to the promptings of the still small voice of God will also mean that we have ears but cannot hear, not only the promptings of God, but also the pleas of men” (A Time to Choose [1972], 59–60, Elder Neal A. Maxwell).

It does sounds cliche, but moments of service have helped me get out of my own head and feel like "myself" again after dark periods. It brings you back to a place of refuge. Trying to be susceptible and aware of the promptings, especially when it seems they don't exist, is an act of faith. It IS faith. Some beautiful council on the topic from Elder Joseph B. Wirthlin:

“I fear that some members of the Lord’s Church ‘live far beneath our privileges’ with regard to the gift of the Holy Ghost. Some are distracted by the things of the world that block out the influence of the Holy Ghost, preventing them from recognizing spiritual promptings. This is a noisy and busy world that we live in. Remember that being busy is not necessarily being spiritual. If we are not careful, the things of this world can crowd out the things of the Spirit... Some are spiritually deadened and past feeling because of their choices to commit sin. Others simply hover in spiritual complacency with no desire to rise above themselves and commune with the Infinite. If they would open their hearts to the refining influence of this unspeakable gift of the Holy Ghost, a glorious new spiritual dimension would come to light. Their eyes would gaze upon a vista scarcely imaginable. They could know for themselves things of the Spirit that are choice, precious, and capable of enlarging the soul, expanding the mind, and filling the heart with inexpressible joy” (in Conference Report, Apr. 2003, 27; or Ensign, May 2003, 27).

These are beautiful promises. Wouldn't we all benefit from them? 

Saturday Verse: Psalm 23

PSALM 23 

1 The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. 2 He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters.
 3 He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name’s sake.
 4 Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.
 5 Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over.
 6 Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the Lord for ever.

Read more on these verses here.

Music for your Midweek: Blonde Redhead

Labor Day Light

Fall came quick, and I'm not too sad. I've been having a lot of bad dreams, which means I'm sleeping well. It's nice and cool, and I can actually stay covered at night without dying of heat. This is the perfect post-summer pre-fall song to me. A bit reminiscent of *Sprout and the Bean, right? Hope you like it.

* Why does Joanna Newsom insist on music videos that give me motion sickness? It's too much.

Saturday Verse: "The Fear of Madness" - Lucretia Davidson

THE FEAR OF MADNESS                                                                                       Written While Confined to Her Bed During Her Last Illness

There is a something which I dread,
    It is a dark, a fearful thing;
It steals along with withering tread,
    Or sweeps on wild destruction's wing. 

That thought comes o'er me in the hour
    Of grief, of sickness, or of sadness;
'Tis not the dread of death—' tis more,
    It is the dread of madness. 

O! May these throbbing pulses pause,
    Forgetful of their feverish course;
May this hot brain, which, burning, glows
    With all its fiery whirlpool's force, 

Be cold, and motionless, and still,
    A tenant of its lowly bed,
But let not dark delirium steal—
.   .   .   .   .   .   .   .   .   .   .   .   .   .   .
                                       [Unfinished]

- Lucretia Davidson                                                                       

Read about her here. 

September Mix: Not Worthy

Who even knows anymore. Here's a mix to run away to.

1. The Knower - Youth Lagoon



2. No Life for Me - Wavves X Cloud Nothings



3. Bad Things - Cults



4. Needles And Pins - Surfer Blood



5. Prince Johnny - St. Vincent



6. The One I Love - Blonde Redhead



7. No One Does It Like You - Department Of Eagles



8. For Tomorrow - Blur



9. Express Yourself  - N.W.A.



10. Les Os - The Unicorns



11. Dancing In The Dark - Bruce Springsteen



12. Ghosts - The Jam



13. Oh Dear - Brandi Carlile



14. Quiet  - Rachael Yamagata

Check it out on Spotify here:
*Rachel Yamagata track missing



NOTES:

1. This album came after Trevor Powers returned to his native Boise Idaho to re-group after one of his friends passed away. That death stuff does something to "I think I've had a lot of barriers in my life in general that I don't let people past, and I've gotten really sick of all that... It's to tiring trying to pretend you don't have as many flaws as everyone else".

Cutie. And my new fashion icon.

He drops some some scary truths on this track. Preach.

4. "...we should be wary
of who we're pretending to be"

5.


6. Cannot get over this song. It was a standout from their show this past summer.

8. Never Let Me Go in song form.

9. Had to include a musical shout out to Straight Outta Compton. Hey moms! This one's clean so share it with your kids so they can get some education.

10. I ended up going to my 10-year high school reunion if you can believe it. This track is in honor of that and all that bittersweet nostalgia I've been feeling lately. I saw The Unicorns in person for the first and last time 11 years and 3 days ago. Weird weird weird.

11. Yeah boi get it.

12. This song kills me. It's a beauty. Love the lyrics.

13. Still feeling haunted by Love & Mercy, and I feel like this song captures those qualities. Even if it's not by the Beach Boys, sound like it could be. You need to see it if you haven't already.

14.

Read here

Music for you Midweek: Emmylou Harris - "Calling My Children Home"

My grandma, Billie Ann, passed away early yesterday morning. She had been in the hospital, rehab, and eventually hospice care over the past month. It was a comfort to know that she was at peace, and free from pain. I visited her with my family on Monday afternoon, knowing she would not be long with us. Jeremy and I played played on the guitar and sang for her.

My mom, aunt Kristin, and grandma Billie Ann at lunch together last summer

My grandma always loved music. She's told us for years that at her funeral, she didn't want any long talks, just favorite hymns and songs. One of her requests was for us to sing "Calling My Children Home". This arrangement by Emmylou Harris is particularly lovely. I hope we can do it justice. Much love to you, grandma.