Something for Sunday: Adversity

I gave a talk on adversity last Sunday. Here it is:

I spent a few years working at a law firm, and am currently working as a proposal writer. So a big focus in my line of work has been in appropriately defining terms. But adversity is one of those heavy words that can mean so many things, it seems almost too big to define. But I’ll still try.

2 Nephi 2:11 says:  

11 For it must needs be, that there is an opposition in all things. If not so, my firstborn in the wilderness, righteousness could not be brought to pass, neither wickedness, neither holiness nor misery, neither good nor bad

And it continues:

14 ...for there is a God, and he hath created all things, both the heavens and the earth, and all things that in them are, both things to act and things to be acted upon.

Separation and defining opposition were the first elements of the creation: 

1 In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth.

He divided the light from the darkeness

And he lifted the firmament from the waters.

And only after all those divisions were made, could life begin to be. Only then could the herb yield seed and the tree yield fruit. 

Mankinds first lessons in Eden were in discerning adversity and becoming acquainted with pain. And we are part of that inheritance.

So many examples of adversity that I have seen in others lives seem too overwhelming to be fair. Francine R Bennion covered some of this topic in a talk she gave at a BYU Women’s conference. In describing suffering, she said: 

Theology does not prevent all hurt and anguish. No knowledge of theology can remove all pain, weakness, or nausea from all terminal cancer. Nor can it fill an empty stomach. What sound theology can do is to help those who believe it to make some sense of the suffering, of themselves, and of God, such sense that they can proceed with a measure of hope, courage, compassion, and understanding of themselves even in anguish.

I hope that some of what I share today can contribute to that measure of hope. I am fortunate enough that I can fill my life with some healthy, easy adversity. When I wake up early enough, I go on a run before work. I am not fast, by any means, but I love pushing my body and stretching my muscles. We are so lucky to live next to a beautiful canyon and have hills that test our strength and speed. I’ve been timing my runs, and have an app on my phone that tells me how far I’ve gone, and what my pace is. And I feel a little happy burst if I find I’ve gotten even the slightest bit faster. After months, or sometimes even weeks of training, I find myself fitter, calmer, and healthier. The benefits come quickly, and it is easy to see that giving up sleep for momentary discomfort is worth it. This is what I think of as a daily, happy adversity. It is ultimately small, and easy to overcome because I can see the big picture, and feel the results of my labor fairly quickly. It’s tempting to compare our trails in life to something like this. A race with peaks and valleys that we will ultimately overcome, and be the better for. The only reason it is worth it is because I get to experience a beginning, middle, and end all in one morning. But in reality, our life is the smallest section or the race. And there is no beginning, and there is no end. And for many of us, we may not ever get to feel the vindication of training that has paid off.

The truth is, so much of pain is purposeless. It is not always enobling or purifying and it is far from God’s will. There is no beauty in children being killed in a mass shooting. Nothing divine in the millions who are affected by drought, famine, and disease. The Lord told Joseph Smith in D&C 122 that. 

And if thou shouldst be cast into the pit, ...if thou be cast into the deep; if the billowing surge conspire against thee; if fierce winds become thine enemy; ...if the very jaws of hell shall gape open the mouth wide after thee, know thou, my son, that all these things shall give thee experience, and shall be for thy good.

This does not mean that adversity in and of itself is good, but that through Christ, it can be made good for us. In 2 Nephi, chapter 2, Lehi discussed this with Jacob, saying: 

Thou art my firstborn in the days of my tribulation in the wilderness. And behold, in thy childhood thou hast suffered afflictions and much sorrow, because of the rudeness of thy brethren.

2 Nevertheless, Jacob,...thou knowest the greatness of God; and he shall consecrate thine afflictions for thy gain.

Even when it seems that affliction is for naught, when a body succumbs to cancer, or a mind is lost to alzheimers, or depression or anxiety makes daily life a trial. These things do not define the ultimate worth of our lives. Thy do not diminish our value to the Lord or the love he has for us. He can turn every bitter sweet. And undo every injustice. 

One of my favorite passages of scripture is found in Joel 2. In it, there is a bleak description of events before the second coming. It describes thick darkness and gloom and destruction. Despite all the hardships the Lord’s people will face, He promises them a future abundance. He says

24  ...the floors shall be full of wheat, and the fats shall overflow with wine and oil.

25 And I will restore to you the years that the locust hath eaten, the cankerworm, and the caterpiller, and the palmerworm, my great army which I sent among you.

26 And ye shall eat in plenty, and be satisfied, and praise the name of the Lord your God, that hath dealt wondrously with you: and my people shall never be ashamed.

I first read this scripture the year my dad passed away unexpectedly after a car accident, and I had spent the next year, more or less, in a daze. I went to work, came home. And every day followed more or less the same in a blur of weeks. Looking back on that period felt like a season of lost time. A year that the locusts had eaten. But God’s promise is that all that is lost will be restored, and that we shall have plenty. I have felt some of the bounties of that harvest in several of the years since, and I am grateful to not have to wait to long to have seen the Lords’ hand at various points throughout my life. 

This scripture will always feel bittersweet to me. The friend who shared it with me has since resigned her membership from the church. Many people I love have chosen to resign their membership. They are people who’s testomonies helped me grow, who were were patient with their own doubts, and compassionate to others. Unbeknownst to them, they had been reassuring me through their examples that if they could stay active in the church, so could I. It very, very lonely to have so many of them gone. And I am so sad, that for many of them the church had become such a place of pain for them instead of a place of solace.

A few years ago, I felt like there wasn’t a place for me here either. Why should I continue to even show up when people I cared about were treated cruelly. If my convictions were so at odds with what I was supposed to believe, why should I keep trying to push through such an obvious cognitive dissonance? I had contacted one of those friends to hear about his experience. He talked about feeling torn apart as he and his wife taught church history and ultimately choosing with his wife to leave. After, they felt like outsiders in their own families. He described how (and I wrote is down so I wouldn’t forget) he said. I want the inside circle and the outside circle to disappear. He wanted us all to become one.

It reminds me of the scriptures in 1st Corinthians 12 ; 

13 For by one Spirit are we all baptized into one body, whether we be Jews or Gentiles, whether we be bond or free; and have been all made to drink into one Spirit.

14 For the body is not one member, but many…

21 And the eye cannot say unto the hand, I have no need of thee: nor again the head to the feet, I have no need of you...

25 That there should be no schism in the body; but that the members should have the same care one for another.

And I think that herein lies the key to truly overcoming adversity. We were not sent here on this earth alone, but to truly help each other reach eternal life. This is outlined in Mosiah 18: 8-9 When Alma invites all to baptism. He says:  

8 ...Behold, here are the waters of Mormon (for thus were they called) and now, as ye are desirous to come into the fold of God, and to be called his people, and are willing to bear one another’s burdens, that they may be light;

9 Yea, and are willing to mourn with those that mourn; yea, and comfort those that stand in need of comfort, and to stand as witnesses of God at all times and in all things, and in all places that ye may be in, even until death, that ye may be redeemed of God, and be numbered with those of the first resurrection, that ye may have eternal life.

It is a requirement, that If we are to overcome adversity,  we must have empathy. No man can enter the kingdom of heaven alone. This is one of the greatest gifts that God has given us to return to him, each other. 

In Sharon Eubank’s talk last conference,  explained how Christ Sees and love us. She said 

“Christ tenderly told the Nephites, “I have commanded that none of you should go away.”7 It is an unwavering requirement of Christian disciples and Latter-day Saints to show true love to one another.9… she goes on to say “The Lord knows how hard you are trying. You are making progress. Keep going. He sees all your hidden sacrifices and counts them to your good and the good of those you love. Your work is not in vain. You are not alone. His very name, Emmanuel, means “God with us.” He is surely with you.”

In an article from BYU Humanities magazine, Thomas Griffith describes the atonement as reconciliation, becoming of one mind. He teaches, “The impulse of the disciple is not division, but at-one-ment. The impulse of the disciple is to reach out to the stranger.”

I believe that as long as we remember that God is with us, all of us, we will have all that is required to let adversity refine us.

Something for Sunday: Mankind is our Business

Oh hey! Remember me?

I gave a talk in my new ward last Sunday. Here it is:

I'm excited to be back in a family ward. It is beautiful to be surrounded by people
from different ages and stages of life. I’ll get to see this first–hand as I’ll be working with
some of your children in my new calling as Primary Chorister.

As a child I grew up in an old home on South Temple; the same one where my
grandmother, Billie Ann Devine grew up. She told us stories about running around the
house with her younger siblings, making rope ladders out of sheets across the second
level staircase, and spending summer nights sleeping in the screened-in porch. But as a
kid myself, my mind was firmly rooted in the present where our own family memories
were being made. We had our own Christmases and voice recitals and parties. I learned
how to ride my bike in the driveway. I choreographed dances on the veranda to the
Titanic soundtrack with my friends. And I climbed onto the roof as a teenager to tan.
I honestly didn’t give too much thought to the prior occupants of the house, even
though they were my own family. Several years ago my dad passed away and my
grandma Billie Ann shortly thereafter. Our family moved out of that old house. Now
older and with added experience, I often drive past that home where a different young
family now lives. I have a more generous mind than I used to, and I think not only of my
own past, but of that of my grandmother and wonder what memories the new family is
cultivating there.

I still have a way to go, but I believe that our ability to see outside of our own
experience into the experiences of others is a Christ-like attribute. To recognize who has
come before us and give thought to those who will come after us strengthens our bond
as an eternal family. Our grandparents and children are not simply ancestors or posterity,
they are our brothers and sisters in Christ. 
Part of the actual assigned topic for this sacrament talk was “How does doing
family history work strengthen our testimony”. Maybe you’ve noticed I’ve taken a
circuitous route to approach this topic, and I have to admit why. I just don’t do family
history work. There certainly are plenty of reminders that it’s something I should focus
on. I think God is nudging me in that direction since one, I was assigned to give this talk
and two, my new apartment is less than a block away from the family history library.
Combine that with the fact that I walk by the temple everyday should be enough of a
sign that family history needs to be a bigger part of my weekly routines. I’m very lucky
though, I have a grandfather and aunts and other family members who are doing so
much of the work already, I’ve justified to myself that if I were to get involved, I’d end up more in the way than anything else. But as I’ve
pondered on this topic, I’ve realized that family history work is far too important to
excuse myself from. There are a few things we can do to help convert ourselves to this
cause.

The first key is to learn about our families and where we came from. A core
purpose of the scriptures is to help us “turn the heart of the fathers to the children, and
the heart of the children to their fathers”, (Malachi 4:10). They work to “show unto the
remnant of the house of Israel what great things the Lord hath done for their fathers;
and that they may know the covenants of the Lord” (introduction to the Book of
Mormon) As prisoners to the present moment, it can be difficult to cultivate a hope for
the future when so much is unknown. The scriptures provide beautiful examples of
people going being led through trials including financial hardship, infertility, political
uncertainty, and familial strife that still resonate today. Aside from the scriptures, we
have the history of our own families, whether they act as cautionary tales or examples
to emulate, can help us cultivate an eternal perspective and guide us in our own
decisions. One of my friends shared with me how her grandfather was disowned by his
own family when he joined the LDS church. “He immigrated to Salt Lake and his wife and
young son died shortly after they arrived. He had lost everything, but his faith... he
eventually was able to remarry and build a life and teach his kids to work and live the
gospel.” My friend told me that seeing their legacy has helped her want to be more
faithful. Another friend described how the example of her grandmother and how she
was able to follow her example when her own marriage was threatened by infidelity.
Now that my friends and I are facing the same sort of challenges are loneliness as our
ancestors, we can have a deeper appreciation of their lives and what they can teach us.

When we learn more about our families, it doesn’t only strengthen our faith through
their example, but helps us develop a true, Christ-like love for them. When we develop
love, it makes us more inclined to find ways to serve. The church’s focus on family history
gives us the chance to emulate the savior as we bring the opportunity to make and keep
sacred covenants to our ancestors. President Ezra Taft Benson spoke on this subject in a
1983 issue of the Ensign:

“Ours is the privilege of opening the doors of salvation to those souls who may be

imprisoned in darkness in the world of spirits, that they may receive the light of the

gospel and be judged the same as we. Yes, ‘the works I do’—proffering the saving

ordinances of the gospel to others—‘shall [ye] do also.’ How many thousands of our

kindred yet await these sealing ordinances? “It is well to ask, ‘Have I done all I can as

an individual on this side of the veil? Will I be a savior to them—my own

progenitors?’ “Without them, we cannot be made perfect! Exaltation is a family

affair” (“Because I Live, Ye Shall Live Also,” Ensign, Apr. 1993, 6).

When we do family history it strengthens the links between the past and the
present. In reality, if we are true believers in eternity, than we understand that the past
is just as much a part of our eternity, as the present and the future. When we choose to
research the history of our families and gather information to perform ordinances and
make covenants on their behalf in the temple, we are participating in a type of holy time
travel. Just as Christ atoned for our sins before our birth, we can bring help bring eternal
blessings to our loved ones after death.

So much of our society is focused on what we can build for ourselves today instead
of what we are creating for others and our common future. The gospel is all about
attending to the needs of others as a way of sanctifying our own soul. Some of my favorite
lines from Charles Dickens “A Christmas Carol” come from the ghost of Jacob Marley. It
reads:

“any Christian spirit working kindly in its little sphere, whatever it may be, will find its
mortal life too short for its vast means of usefulness… no space of regret can make
amends for one life's opportunity misused!” `But you were always a good man of
business, Jacob,' faltered Scrooge, who now began to apply this to himself.

`Business!' cried the Ghost, wringing its hands again. `Mankind was my business. The
common welfare was my business; charity, mercy, forbearance, and benevolence, were,
all, my business. The dealings of my trade were but a drop of water in the comprehensive
ocean of my business!'

Family history brings our focus to the business of mankind. As we look at the
legacies of those who came before us, we can’t help but examine what type of actions
we are taking today. What are we doing now that can guarantee a bright future for the
families that will come after us? Everyday bring us new opportunities to be generous
with others. To be active and informed citizens and neighbors. To be better stewards to
our earth. And to make space for those who are marginalized or forgotten. Building our
present and appreciating our past is all for naught if we are not  focused on mankind as
our business, like Jacob Marley said. President Benson said, “Exaltation is a family affair”.
Our family is not limited to our own nuclear homes, but extends to everyone.
If it is God’s purpose is “to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man”
(Moses 1:39). Then it is our purpose to help with that work. In an April 2016 general
conference talk, President Eyring said “It is because our priesthood obligation is to put
our families and the families of those around us at the center of our concern. Every
major decision should be based on the effect it will have on a family to qualify for life
with Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ. There is nothing in our priesthood service as
important as this… As we are faithful in our service to help Heavenly Father’s children
to go home to Him, we will qualify for the greeting we all so much want to hear when
we finish our earthly ministry. These are the words: “Well done, thou good and faithful
servant: thou hast been faithful over a few things, I will make thee ruler over many things:
enter thou into the joy of thy lord” (Matthew 25:21).”

Something for Sunday: "The Whole Gamut of Human Endeavor"

4-23-2017

One year while I was at BYU, I made a goal to attend every BYU devotional. They were held on Tuesday mornings, and during that block of time, there were no classes and practically no campus resources, so that helped my goal. I don't remember too much about those devotionals, but I do remember them as a weekly time set apart where I could think, or listen, or just let my mind wander. It was a welcome thing.

This evening as a drove toward Memory Grove, I caught a snippet of this talk on the radio and loved it. It's for everyone, really. Have a listen:

She mentions this blog post by Ariel Suzich, and this this talk by President Gordon B. Hinckley. I especially loved the following quote:

"Study your options. Pray to the Lord earnestly for direction. Then pursue your course with resolution.The whole gamut of human endeavor is now open to women. There is not anything that you cannot do if you will set your mind to it... 

For you, my dear friends, the sky is the limit. You can be excellent in every way. You can be first class. There is no need for you to be a scrub. Respect yourself. Do not feel sorry for yourself. Do not dwell on unkind things others may say about you... Polish and refine whatever talents the Lord has given you. Go forward in life with a twinkle in your eye and a smile on your face, but with great and strong purpose in your heart." 

Give is a listen to feel extra inspired:

All good counsel

Happy Sunday

Make America Create Again

"Someday... 

I ain't wasting no more time"

03/31/2017

I've been reading some books on creativity (that a church friend has generously let me borrow for far too long), and they have been striking a chord. Here's Steven Pressfield talking about fundamentalism in his book, The War of Art:

"The artist and the fundamentalist both confront the same issue, the mystery of their existence as individuals. Each asks the same questions: Who am I? Why am I here? What is the meaning of my life?
     ...The artist is grounded in freedom. He is not afraid of it. He is lucky. He was born in the right place. He has a core of self-confidence, of hope for the future. He believes in progress and evolution. His faith is that humankind is advancing, however haltingly and imperfectly toward a better world.
     The fundamentalist entertains no such notion. In his view, humanity has fallen from a higher state. The truth is not out there awaiting revelation; it has already been revealed. The word of God has been spoken and recorded by His prophet, be he Jesus, Muhammad, or Karl Marx.
     To combat the call of sin... the fundamentalist plunges either into action or into the study of sacred texts. He loses himself in these, much as the artist does in the process of creation. The difference is that while the one looks forward, hoping to create a better world, the other looks backward, seeking to return to a purer world from which he and all have fallen.
      ...The humanist believes that humankind, as individuals, is called upon to co-create the world with God. This is why he values human life so highly. In his view, things do progress, life does evolve; each individual has value, at least potentially, in advancing this cause. The fundamentalist cannot conceive of this. In his society, dissent is not just crime but apostate; it is heresy, transgression against God Himself." 

- Steven Pressfield, The Art of War, pg. 33-37

                               

Cultivating creativity in my life has also strengthened me spiritually, despite that fact that we are often taught to believe it would have the opposite effect. In reality, it is fundamentalism that is a corruption of true faith, stripping it of it's hope and agency. As I've been watching the new Trump administration, I've seen how fundamentalist and fear-based thinking seems to be legitimized in every other executive order. What values are we endorsing? What views are we validating? 

I think Woody Guthrie got it right. We can use our god-given gifts of creativity to combat poisonous thinking. It's important, for reals. Especially in the face of this. Deanna Haggag, who was recently profiled in Vogue, has something to say about art in times of political strife:

"Why put any skills or efforts into protecting this thing when there are a million other fights? When millions of Americans could potentially die if certain things are repealed and cut? ...The reason the federal government wants to defund arts is that the arts have the power to make people think for themselves, and in every moment when there’s been a fascist society they try to remove the arts because they know that a painting can wage war. 

...We, the community of artists in the world, that’s our job: to bring nuance to light, to open up different ways of looking and seeing. And so part of the job of supporting artists is supporting that, too. The arts, the national parks, public broadcast: We’re just all part of a team; we have to be on the defense all the time so that things like housing and nutrition can be on the offense."

If you're a writer, write. If you're a dancer, dance. If you're afraid to call yourself a doer of the thing you want to do, take a crazy leap and start including it in your personal introductions. We all have an art to share, and there really isn't any time to waste.