Friday the 13th: Hobo with a shotgun

I hope you had a good Friday the 13th! Mine was fab.

It's late.

I got home from catering a bit ago, which reminded me of catering last week. Let me explain.

Christian only eats things in certain number. His daily, morning routine takes 2 hours. His belongings, (and even his thoughts) have to be perfectly in order and symmetrical. It can be exhausting for us; even more so for him. Living at home with my brother who is diagnosed with OCD helps me realize the "obsessions" and rituals I've created in my own life. While I hardly face the same challenges he does, remember those things helps me relate.

This usually happens when it's dark and late and I'm generally by myself. 

Example: When I head to my room late at night, I make myself do "something" for 10, 15, or 20 seconds while I walk up the stairs. The "thing" I do could be holding a glass of water against my chin, dragging  my index finger and pinky along the banister, holding onto my earlobe, etc. Usually, it requires holding my body in the same general position till I reach the top of the stairs/my room/the light. If I don't do this, something "unfortunate" would happen. It's kind of like making a bet with myself. If I complete those "bets", it assures my safety.

Which brings me to catering last week. When I'm also alone and super nervous, I picture the scariest/worst things I can think of. The rational in my head is that if I imagine it happening, then it won't happen. Horrible things only happen when You least expect them. But last week, it got out of control. I was coming home from a dinner with a van full of dirty dishes and things to be sorted. I thought that people would be at the shop when I got there, but I was all alone. The shop is close to the Provo river, and sort of isolate. I was ready to be freaked out. So I started thinking of the scariest things for example:

HOBO WITH A SHOTGUN

What? That doesn't sound scary to you? It actually sounds comical? Oh. You are so wrong.

This movie came out at Sundance last year. I didn't see it of course; I imagine it's really bloody and awful. But when I was in the shop late that night, I kept imagining a hobo with a shotgun, creeping around the corner. 

HOBO WITH A SHOTGUN 

...IN THE KITCHEN

HOBO WITH A SHOTGUN 

...IN THE HALL

HOBO WITH A SHOTGUN 

...IN THE BATHROOM

HOBO WITH A SHOTGUN 

...IN THE BATHROOM STALL

HOBO WITH A SHOTGUN 

...IN THE FRIDGE

HOBO WITH A SHOTGUN 

...IN THE WALK-ON FREEZER

HOBO WITH A SHOTGUN 

...WAITING OUTSIDE THE DOOR

HOBO WITH A SHOTGUN 

...IN THE DARK

HOBO WITH A SHOTGUN 

...UNDER MY CAR

HOBO WITH A SHOTGUN 

...IN MY BACKSEAT

HOBO WITH A SHOTGUN 

...RIGHT BEHIND ME!!!

This is what I was thinking over and over. Now are you scared? Now do you know how I feel?

Usually when I get too scared, I try to think of this: 

Makes it all better.